• “The 12 Burning Wheels” in print ($7.99)“
• “The 12 Burning Wheels” Kindle version (3.95)
• DRM-free e-book formats directly from M Brane SF ($3.99)

That means I need to write 5,000 more by March 31 to stay on time, to stay on track.

A few hours later, I ended up with 1,350 new words. I am at 14,000.

If my quota for this month is 10,000 words, that means I gotta keep on going, moving, moving. I have about 6,000 more words to write for the month of March.

GONNA GET THERE.

However, I do think one can improve one’s writing as a craft. I do not debate the benefits of reaction and feedback from a seasoned writer or peer.

And yet, I have avoided writers’ groups like the plague. I have been approached by friends in the past who talk about these groups with an intensity that borders on religious fervor. Sorry, I am not attending your church, I have thought to myself.

In 2010 I got to meet a group of Chicago writers who had experience in workshops (many of attended Clarion), and I liked their company and professionalism. We had a beer. We had two. We read at Tuesday Funk. Over time, someone suggested starting a writers’ group. I began to sweat. Could I do this? Would I get annoyed? What would happen to my writing?

We began to meet. I submitted some of my work. We drank a beer. We drank two. I got feedback on my work. And we repeated the process (once, we even Skyped me in from Berlin).

Well, I am happy to report I am very happy to be part Error of Judgment, the writing group I belong to with the likes of Holly McDowell, William Shunn, Dustin Monk, Eden Robbins and Tom Underberg.

I don’t always submit a story or chapter, but when I do, I have learned a lot about my own work (in a way that is very similar to when I have shared my full manuscripts with my first readers). The advice they give is articulate and thoughtful, even if I may disagree with it. In fact, the advice  has kept me moving in my project “The Ocean Hunters,” and though I am not sure how much of it we will discuss in detail by the time I have it in full completed draft, I know that I will have had invaluable feedback.

I had always thought that writers’ groups were writing by committee, a violation of the artistic vision of a writer. After becoming more comfortable with the way we operate as a group, I realize  that this type of feedback is really useful. What’s more, its usefulness comes from the fact that I respect each of these writers for their craft, professionalism and spirit.

This Thursday I will gather with Error of Judgment for another session. I don’t have any new copy, but I will provide feedback to the others. I cannot wait.

Somewhere, Gentle Readers, I changed. I am not sure or exactly how, but I did. I am still working closely with myself and by myself, but opening up windows into my work while it is still in development has felt good in this environment. I hope you can find the right environment for your writing, too.

I first read Isherwood in my twenties, and he influenced me so much. He was committed to craft, but also to his principles as a gay person. He carved out a niche all his own.

Whether you care about queer fiction or you care about literary fiction, you should know Isherwood. This archived interview sheds light on what he was like.

Isherwood didn’t spend all his life in Berlin, and yet, he is often linked to this city because of his short stories and other writings. He lived in Berlin for about 4 years, and he left before Hitler came to power. Isherwood is a great reminder of the kinds of lives that can make writers flourish. My stay in Berlin is certainly not as long, but I know this time will be highly influential for me and my writing. I am not sure yet how it will impact my work, and I prefer not to dissect and analyze. Instead, I continue to enjoy Berlin and its strange techno-calm, its hidden cafes and empty streets.

I feel thankful for this opportunity to be here. The world is once again in flux, and it was important for me to see this place as all nations move into a new place.

Incidentally, I wrote 814 new words today in “The Ocean Hunters” today.

Well, unless you were being paid by that brand, you probably thought to yourself, well, I should endorse this if I actually would use it, if I actually believe in it.

Pretty simple logic, if you ask me.

Well, we live in a world with very high sheen, a world of glossy surfaces and marketing messages crafted so tightly that you can’t even find a single seam. We live in a world where it’s easy to click to “Like” and show your support.

We live in troubled times. Our population won’t stop growing, our oceans are going to shit, resources are diminishing, and our democratic institutions are questionable as ever.

It is during times like these that organizations and products, at all levels and sizes, begin to pop up to solve these problems with more intensity than before. We are here to help out! We are here to fix the problem. We are here to create solutions! are familiar lines that come from these places.

It’s hard to distill what is an honest sentiment from a need to turn a profit. Perhaps this is nothing new, perhaps I am simply showing my age as I near the mark of forty, and perhaps, if you had known me at 25 years of age, you might have said, “Cesar, don’t be naive. You should know better.”

Well, I consider myself lucky to live in a country that is responsible for so much global change. I do not think America is bringing down the world or ruining democracy, though certain people in America certainly are.

What I really have a problem with are the snake-oil salesmen of this world, especially the ones wearing the shiny do-gooder badge. This permeates through the corporate and non-profit world, but also through the arts. If you look deep down inside the murky corners of a human heart, can we determine if that heart actually intends to do good? It’s hard to know nowadays. It’s easy to jump on the bandwagon and call something “green” or “democratic” or “fair trade.” But do any of us actually try to find out the story beneath it, to see if these words are actually supported by actions and thoughts? Are any of us willing to completely challenge our frameworks to live differently and actually change injustices?

I certainly think we should try. It’s not easy. And my suspicion is that the answers are not found in a board room, in an executive summary or the latest buzzword of hope for yuppies.

I have a feeling that real change is found in daily actions, in daily thought and deed. Coming out of the closet is no easy feat, and yes, I do think it gets better. But the real action is found when someone prevents bullying, when someone comes out to their workplace. Real change happens when we kick start the status quo and perform acts of civil disobedience. Real change comes from not relying on a model and philosophy of accelerated growth and endless profit.

Why would I be writing about this in my blog, you ask? Well, because I do think it’s the responsibility of novelists to challenge the world through ideas. Lately I find myself thinking about the manuscripts I have written, and I want my novels to be truthful. I want my fiction to be truthful, and in turn, I want my real-life actions to be truthful. As I look at ideas I have tried to express in my stories, and I also look at choices I have made in years past, I believe that there is a long way for me to go. This isn’t to say that I haven’t been pursuing a place of truth, but I think I could have gone further with my ideas.

I have met many charlatans in my time, and I wish them well, but I also hope that truth wins out. However, I will not let my words misrepresent me. If I believe in you, I will say it. If I don’t, I will not lie.

The core of good books is in this truthful sort of spirit. Some of the most transgressive novels I read as a kid still resound with me thanks to their keen eye on the world. Thank you Gore Vidal, John Updike, Clive Barker, Elena Poniatowska, Harlan Ellison and many more. Even if I just write silly stories about monsters, dragons and killer robots, I want to know that I pursued a truth in my writing. Using words to communicate with the world is powerful, and those of use who do it should wield this power without deceit. This post is a follow up about courage, and as I move further into “The Ocean Hunters,” I want to strike truth like a pick axe striking ore, or a machete hitting bone.

And for those of you who have come into contact with me over time, if you have been deceitful about your true intentions, now you know why I am not at your side.

Sometimes we need guts. It is with guts that we perform acts of bravery.

I don’t think people will contest the assertion above. Guts, courage, whatever you want to call it — it’s what makes us perform amazing feats. Guts help us get out of dangerous situations, too.

I have to admit to you that I have needed my own boost of courage to write in my current manuscript, “The Ocean Hunters.” I have needed guts, and I haven’t found them. The fear of failure was stopping me, and I needed guts. Recently, I found them.

You didn’t see me need the guts to finish that half marathon last September. You didn’t see me need guts to fly to Berlin. You didn’t see me need guts to take on 2012 by the horns like a wild bull.

No, I needed the most guts to continue in a novel that makes me feel challenged, and makes me feel good. This seems incongruous, I know. Welcome to novel writing.

I have the courage now. The courage to see it through.

I wrote 792 new words today in “The Ocean Hunters.” And that took guts. Tomorrow I will do it all over again.

Up until now, my project “The Ocean Hunters” has remained fairly loose, a set of vignettes that will become a full novel. Up until now, the lack of constraints has allowed me to think about it, to ruminate its ideas, while I run and walk in the streets of Berlin.

We are now in the midst of February, and with firm ideas now in place, the time has come to get real.

Time for structure.

This novel will be my main project of the year, and in order to end up with an actual workable draft, I am going to need to set some goals. These have been coming for sometime, but today, I am writing them down to make them happen.

Screvener tells me I have written 10,472 words thus far in “The Ocean Hunters.” I need a complete working manuscript by September. The goal for this work is 90,000 words, and so here we go.

I need 80,000 words over the next eight months. That’s 10,000 words a month.

THIS JUST GOT REAL.

Are you willing to follow me on this path? Let’s do it.

The last time I wrote clear goals down in this blog, I actually finished my manuscript, and on time (“Carapace”). It’s time to do it all over again.

This morning I wrote 600 new words. That’s 600 words in the piggy bank. As I hit these mini-deadlines each day, I’ll post the word counts on this here blog. If you notice my absence, you know I have done you wrong. If you see me often, it means one day you may see this novel at your favorite retailer.

In other writing news, I am doing some rewrites of a previous novel I wrote, querying again. Feels good.

And onward we go.

Tuesday Funk, Chicago’s eclectic monthly reading series where good writing and good beer mix, is looking for five writers to fill out a special program of speculative fiction readings on the evening of Tuesday, September 4th, 2012.

Hosted by William Shunn and Sara Ross Witt, Tuesday Funk readings take place the first Tuesday of every month at Hopleaf Bar on Chicago’s North Side. Each edition features five writers reading for 12 minutes apiece, plus a “Poem By Bill” and a halftime break for beer.

For its September 4th reading, Tuesday Funk wants to draw on the immense pool of imaginative talent converging on Chicago for Worldcon. If you plan to spend some extra time in Chicago after the con, you are invited to submit your name for consideration. For more information, please visit the Tuesday Funk website.

Full details here.

I think I have a code name for this project. I am calling it “The Ocean Hunters”. As some of you know, my code names often reflect the work, though obliquely. In this current draft, I am really feeling my way in there as if I were blindfolded, and I feel a bit anxious, nervous. This says to me that things are just where they should be in my writing process.

The days are grey here in Berlin, and I like it. Seeing the city in the daylight is my favorite thing. Berlin in the hours of 9 a.m. through 2 p.m. feels mine, and mine alone. Today I ran before my writing session, and I clocked 3 miles at a glacial pace, since I really went at it hard yesterday for four miles. Tomorrow is a day off from writing and that makes me very happy. I have to rest these legs, too.

I have not put writing sessions into my weekends in Berlin, but now that I am moving into my first draft in full, I will want to add Saturdays to my schedule. I still feel very behind on query work, and I must make this time up. My previously written novels are not going to sell themselves.

Today’s writing soundtrack reveals a glance back at the past, through the prism of the remix. Book of Love put out some soft and warm pop back then, but their odd remix/mashup of Pretty Boys and Pretty Girls (a haunting AIDS-era anxiety dream) and Tubular Bells of “Exorcist” fame, made for the perfect cut as I myself hacked my way forward in this manuscript.

This update marks my first update in a few months. This year’s work is simple. I will finish and polish this current manuscript. For my previous project, I capped the work at 85,000 words, and I think I will need a smiler constraint for this work. I don’t have that number yet. My writing sessions are not generating long word counts, and I think I need to make my way forward with more ease in order to not lose momentum.

In essence, I have got to keep writing. With a sizable body of work, I can set some limits to it later on. I will make this decision in February.

For now, I am working in what I feel is my most challenging project to date. This one feels ambitious, in terms of the level of language I want to achieve, but also its potential success to go to market. Wish me luck, Gentle Readers.

My surroundings have helped my writing on this project. As I write this, I am looking out onto the streets of Berlin, and I couldn’t feel better about having access to this city while writing this novel. This is a big year for my writing goals.

On the back burner I have more query work happening, since I am still looking for agent representation for my previously written works. As a companion piece to all this writing, I am training for a half marathon. To me, writing and running are companion activities, so we can easily say that 2012′s goals are not modest.

I have missed you, Gentle Readers. My apologies for being gone for so long.

Now I must return to my manuscript, which is currently 9,083 words long.

My bio is due later this week. What do you like to see in an author bio? Want to give me some tips on what I should include?

Help me, Lovers.

Today at around Noon, I will answer questions live, via Skype for them. I’m so thrilled. Here’s a sampling of their questions:

THE BROKEN CHEST

• Who, or what, was the Sphinxe? Does it really matter or was it just a way to pull the reader into the story then switch directions?
• Does the Sphinxe matter to the ultimate story, which isn’t really about the Sphinxe at all?
• Does the time/place/era of the story matter to the story you were trying to tell?
• What inspired this story?
  In this story science and magic combine. Do you only write in the sci-­?fi/fantasy
• genre?

RED LIGHT AND SHADOW 

• Is this story an allegory for climate change, or was climate change a common knowledge concept that you could use to tell the story through the tree’s perspective?
• Were the shadows meant to represent anything? A real environmental threat or an allegory to mythical/fictional creature?
• Is there a hidden meaning beyond the implications towards global warming and environmental change?
• How challenging is it to combine the flow of poetry with a prose story line?
• Is the tree representative of people and their own mortality?
• Why don’t trees have souls?

Querying is not a simple task, and it’s not gentle on the writer’s ego. To query properly, you read up on an agent, you figure out the submissions guidelines for that agency, you customize your letter to said agent, and you send out a brief letter that is meant to represent all the hard work you have put into your manuscript over several years.

When the rejection letters begin to stack up, I do not freak out.

Our manuscripts are meant to be rejected. There’s nothing new about this. I generally feel better the longer the stack of rejection letters gets. Rejection means I am putting in my time, doing good work, even if an agent hasn’t loved one of my manuscripts yet. Eventually an agent will pick up interests in my novels, and constant querying is the way I will make this happen.

In order to track who I have been querying and how often, I have previously used two well-loved tools. I have updated spreadsheets in Google Docs, marking columns for dates sent, name of agent, response, and whether I can (or should requery) at a later point. I also combined this spreadsheet with Gmail filters, so that responses from agents are routed to special folders labeled according to each novel I’m querying for. Incidentally, I have two novels to sell.

I have used this combo of spreadsheets and filters for about two years.

However, checking these folders can be a bit cumbersome, especially when you consider that I also have to keep a separate address book to track agencies street addresses, agents’ Twitter accounts and more.

We are living in the age of automation, Gentle Readers. I looked around a few weeks ago, and I realized I was spending too much time tracking queries this way. The automation of software is here to help!

I signed up for a basic account for Highrise from 37 signals. A lot of companies use this customer relationship management application to keep track of sales and to integrate deals. I have used Basecamp extensively in my dayjobbery, and I decided to try it out.

Guess what? It does what I need it to do. I may post at length about this later on, but just check it out:

• When I write a query, all I need to do now is cc the inbox that Highrise creates for me so that it begins to track the correspondence I have with a literary agent.
• If I send a Word doc or PDF as an attachment, Highrise catalogues that file so I can see exactly what version of any manuscript I have sent
• I have a very easy way to mark a deal as pending or awarded. The day I click that box for being represented by an agent, I’m going to tear my shirt off and run out into the street shouting.
• I can keep a very clean and easily implemented list of agents, publishers and other literary contacts. This is key. I do not want to integrate this address book with my personal or work address book, so the ability to put this agenting address book in one place is key.

]]> http://cesartorres.net/blog/?feed=rss2&p=1798 0 http://cesartorres.net/blog/?p=1794 http://cesartorres.net/blog/?p=1794#comments Tue, 27 Sep 2011 22:09:01 +0000 Urraca http://cesartorres.net/blog/?p=1794 I just found out a story from my book the “12 Burning Wheels” will going to be discussed in a classroom in Dallas.

Indeed. Seventh and eighth graders are currently reading “The Broken Chest” from the collection, as well as “Red Light and Shadow” this week in my friend Beau’s class. His students will be formulating questions for the author through next week. I feel flattered and grateful. Can’t wait to field their questions.

You can buy “The 12 Burning Wheels” in print or download to your Kindle.

THERE WILL BE SKULLS.

In 2009, I wrote a handful of stories that became the collection “The 12 Burning Wheels.”

After the book was published, I continued writing, knowing that one should never stop, never stop.

Did I mention again that one should never stop?

The project I was developing at the time was tentatively named “Rochnacht.”

Sometime in 2010,  I simply…lost the plot. I won’t go into dull detail here on why, but both the inspiration and my own daily practice of devoting time to that manuscript dwindled pretty much to nothing.

And now, several months later, I have put “Rotnacht” on hold and begun something new altogether. Maybe I needed to detoxify myself a bit. Not sure.

I am working on a manuscript now, and working in my usual way: Write about two to three times a week, keep a track of word counts, and try not too look back at drafts too long until the whole novel is complete. When I wrote my second novel, I gave myself some very tight deadlines to deliver the manuscript, and I learned a lot from that process. Strangely enough, I enjoyed it.

This time around, though, I am not working on clockwork. I am committing to a minimum of 3,000 words per week, but that is perhaps the only real constraint. I haven’t come up with a code name for this project, but I’ll be sure to post it once I do.

This time, I am also getting early first reader feedback, which is a little different than before. In fact, I sent off one chapter to a first reader today, and I will send two chapters to my two others, who also happen to be fiction writers.

All of these events measure up to an eventful autumnal season. Productive, full of joy, and also filled with challenges ahead, as I try to figure out my way through a third novel. I’m not sure how everyone else does it, but this is the best way I know how. Make the time, write some copy, and don’t look back until the thing is done. Then commit several months to rewriting.

Later this week I’ll provide some updates on the querying process and when you can expect new books from me.

I’m writing, and there’s so much to tell you about. Thank you for sticking with me during my absence. Fire up your RSS readers, in case you still are using one.

Here’s why:

I’m not going away! You can now find my posts on Twitter exclusively by following me at http://twitter.com/urraca. Additionally, I’ll make occasional video posts via my YouTube account. You can find it at www.youtube.com/user/urraca500. If you watched the video above, you’ll also know I’ll be redesigning my web site, so stay tuned for a re-launch this Spring. Thank you, Gentle Readers, for being loyal, true, and attractive.